My dear Lord, I can but tell Thee that Thou knowest I long for nothing but Thyself, nothing but holiness, nothing but union with Thy will. Thou hast given me these desires, and thou alone canst give me the thing desired. My soul longs for communion with Thee, for mortification of indwelling corruption, especially spiritual pride. How precious it is to have a tender sense and clear apprehension of the mystery of godliness, of true holiness! What a blessedness to be like Thee as much as it is possible for a creature to be like its creator! Lord, give me more of Thy likeness; enlarge my soul to contain fullness of holiness; engage me to live more for Thee. Help me to be less pleased with my spiritual experiences, and when I feel at ease after sweet communings, teach me it is far too little I know and do. Blessed Lord, let me climb up near to Thee, and love, and long, and plead, and wrestle with Thee, and pant for deliverance from the body of sin, for my heart is wandering and lifeless, and my soul mourns to think it should ever lose sight of its beloved. Wrap my life in divine love, and keep me ever desiring Thee, always humble and resigned to Thy will, more fixed on Thyself, that I may be more fitted for doing and-suffering.
Valley of Vision--Longing After God
I finally have some time to sit down and reflect on the Middle School missions trip that we just took a week ago. It was a hard trip, and yet a good trip. God is good, and He continues to work in EACH of us, including the youth on the trip. I was emotional going into the trip already, having to say goodbye to my boyfriend in the church parking lot as we were loading up to leave. Its always such a hard and awkward moment, as your youth kids are watching you weep, and get all emotional. At that point though, I didn't even care. I wanted them to see how much I care for him, and let them see that this isn't easy, and that Nie- Nie does have a real life outside of work and church. I cried for awhile, and then was able by the grace of God, get through the rest of the trip.
I am thankful for the God's grace, and His strength for without it I don't think I would have been able to get through the trip. The work projects throughout the trip were good, nothing to hard, just sort of minotinous, and kinda boring, but we knew that they had to get done. As a leader, this was one of the more difficult trips, but I truly believe that God is working daily in these youth's lives, teaching them things, and drawing them to Himself. We studied the book of Philippians while on the trip, which I was pumped about, because Philippians is my favorite book! I always learn new things and am reminded every time how my focus needs to be daily centered on the cross, denying myself, and looking to Jesus. Living a life of selflessness. I enjoyed hearing the hearts of the girls as we broke into smaller groups at the end of devotions. Always such a joy.
Its great to see the kids unwind after a long day at Baskin Robbins for ice cream and then go jump in the pool and play a game of water volleyball. The kids did great and grew from this experience. I am thankful that the Lord is faithful to each one of us, and works in us all. I pray that these students continue that desire to know God deeper and have a radical focus on their Savior.
I thought I would share with you a quote that I absolutely love from my book that I am reading A Praying Life. Just to give you a brief heads-up, I will be going on a missions trip with my middle school youth starting Sunday, so I will be away from my computer for the next week or so starting Sunday.
My boyfriend leaves on Monday to go back to his duties with the Navy. It will be so hard to say goodbye as I have loved every single moment we've had together, and have cherished each one. But for now the Lord still has us apart, even though its brutally wrenching on both of us to be away from each other, we STILL believe that He is doing amazing work in both of us as we are apart, and will continue to work out His ways in our lives. We hope to be back together again in August when I hope to fly down to Texas where he will be for the next 3 months...About 8 weeks..Pray for me ;)
On another side note, please be in prayer still for my dear friends Drew and Amy, as I described their situation in my previous post, but also now, I ask you to pray for my brother Dan. His nose was broken pretty bad last night during a softball game. We were in the ER for awhile, and he was later resting at home, and had to re admitted to the ER for fluids as he couldn't keep anything down. He will be fine, he has Dr.'s appts. next week, to get the stitches out, and then to figure out what the next step is. Needless to say he won't be coming with us to MO as planned. But God know what He is doing, in the midst of all this craziness.
Thanks for your prayers for everything, I will be sure to update you on everything when I return.
If God is sovereign, the He is in control of all the details of my life. If He is loving, then He is going to be shaping the details of my life for my good. If He is all-wise, then he's not going to do everything I want because I don't know what I need. If he is patient, then He is going to take time to do all this. When we put all these things together--God's sovereignty, love,wisdom, and patience--We have a divine story.
I am asking you my blog readers to join with me in prayer for some dear friends of mine. Drew and Amy have been friends of mine for awhile, and we have enjoyed great memories together, including the Papiller Cup golf tournament. On Friday, Drew went in to get an MRI done because he had been feeling sorta weird in his head, and thought that something wasn't right. (He is a nurse). On Saturday it was discovered that he has a brain tumor. His dear wife Amy, is 3 weeks away from delivering their first child. Just about a month ago Amy's dear grandmother pasted away. Its been a quite trying few weeks for them.
Through it all they continue to trust in our mighty and sovereign Lord, the great physician, and Powerful God. They are seeking comfort in His arms and trusting Him through it all. They are such great Godly people who love the Lord with all that they are.
Pray with me for the Lord to be glorified and magnified through all of this, If be the Lord's will that He would heal Drew, and that Drew would be well enough and alert enough to be there for their first child's birth. We serve an awesome, amazing, good God. Who's plans are better than ours. And knows what He is doing. To God be the glory.
I have decided to take a break from reading Counterfeit Gospels, and start reading a book called A Praying Life by Paul Miller. Don't get me wrong, I am thoroughly enjoying reading and understanding the truth of the gospel that is so clearly stated throughout the book of Counterfeit Gospels, and I may simultaneously read both, but for now I have decided to read A Praying Life.
My women's Bible study that I am involved in twice a month is going through this book. We just started last Saturday, and I am already loving every single thing in the book! I feel like I am now not the only one who may struggle with prayer at times. I am learning so much from this book about my prayers being more about my relationship with God, rather than just a set list of things that I am "supposed" to be praying about, or feel like I have to be praying for. God wants me to come to Him, Just as I am, a broken, unworthy, sinner who daily needs my Jesus give me daily strength and depend on Him for all of my needs.
The women's Bible study is fantastic. I love going to it, and hearing different women share about their experiences in their Christian walk, and hear where they are at, and where we can be encouraging of each other. I thank the Lord for these group of all-aged women who love the Lord with all their hearts, and are daily trying to pursue holiness and Christ likeness with all that they are. Its so great.
On another note, today was my last day nannying! Its a bitter sweet moment for me, I am going to miss the kids a lot, but I am ready for summer, and working one job. And the kids are ready for their momma to be home too! I am sure I will be over there every so often to watch them, but I am ready for my summer! My time with my boyfriend is going unbelievably well. I am enjoying and soaking every moment I have with him. I am so blessed to have him in my life, and I am thankful to the Lord for the work He is doing in both of us, and how the Lord has brought us together.!
I am off to enjoy the 94 degree weather. Happy Wednesday.
Sorry its been about a week since I last posted, I was having some blogging trouble and for now it looks as if things are up and running again, for how long? I don't quite know yet..Hopefully for good ;)
So in my last post I told you what book I am now going through in my personal time...Its called Conterfeit Gospels. It is absolutly amazing. I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend it for everyone to read. It speaks the gospel truth so clearly and how our world seems to be deminishing the truth of the gospel to fit what we think, and how to make it more about us, and less about Christ and what He has done for us in His life, death, and resurrection. I urge all of you to pick it up and read it. Well worth your time. I hope to blog about it more as I learn and grow.
Also lately whats been going on. Well, lets see, I TURNED 25!! Wahoo! I can't believe that I am 25. I am officially I guess in my mid 20's! My year of being 24 was the best ever, and I am so, so excited to see what the Lord has in store for me in my year of being 25. I spent my birthday with my boyfriend. He is in town for the next 3 weeks (which is also why my blogs maybe lacking within the next couple weeks ;) and he spoiled me beyond belief! We had the best day. Just being together, We went to lunch, took a walk, and did ministry together. I am so blessed to have him here with me and just be a real couple for a few weeks. Its been so awesome having him here with me in person! I am sure there will be many blog entry's to come of what we did over the 3 weeks he was here. I am looking forward to using the present he gave me on Sunday..Michael Buble tickets! I love Michael Buble. He is my favorite ever.!!!
Work is still going well, Enjoying the time left with the kids, and the time at the salon is going well too, nothin to crazy is going on there! Just doing life I guess! Happy weekend!
